Smart Marriage and Smart Phones: Can You Have Both?

"There needs to be smart phone rules for married couples, like don't take them to bed when making love." Paul W Anderson, PhD, marriage counselor 843-422-1408

Table of Contents
  1. Marriage And Smart Phones Can Coexist, But...
  2. Smart Phones Trump Marriage
  3. Tips For Married Smart Phone Users
  4. Don't Take Smart Phone To Your Bed
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Actually, there is some pretty solid research indicating that smart couples can use technology, including smart phones, to enhance togetherness and connection. Bottom line, Smart phones can be a two edged sword.  The challenge is to use these devices so they cut properly one way and don’t draw blood in the other, that is, not damage precious relationships.

Smart marriage first, Smart phones second

Couples can and do decide to do both, have a significant relationship with each other and use smart phones on a regular basis. But, a stark reality must be accepted first:

  • Smart phones can break a marriage.
  • However, a smart marriage cannot stem the presence of smart phones in our lives or make people stop using them, often addictively.
  • Conclusion; Marriages are weaker than Smart phones.

Marital relationships must be protected from the encroaching negative effects of smart phones. There needs to be strong and clear-cut cell phone useage rules for married couples.

Here are some tips and suggestions about how smart marriage/relationships and smart phones can coexist:

  • First and foremost, make a decision which is more important to you as a couple: your marriage or the use of your smart phones. If you do not deal with this on a conscious level, smart phones and the advertisers and developers that are related to them will make the decision for you. The phone will keep you in the games, keep you listening to music, keep you texting and e-mailing and reward you for doing so. Smart phones and all that goes with them do not care about you having a smart and sustained marriage. And, why should they? It’s none of their business. Their business is to keep the smart phone industry well and alive.
  • Your business, as a married person (should you so choose to live that way in a committed significant relationship), is to realize how fragile and yet valuable a marriage or significant relationship can be. With this in mind, the smart couple will make conscious and deliberate efforts together to make sure smart phones are second, smart marriage is first.

How you do that is up to you but, it boils down to who/what you pay attention to the most and first. At one time smart phones and computers were seen as work tools. When a person went home, they left their working tools at work. And, the converse was true in that people tried not to take home issues with them to work.

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